FRQs: A Rant

… but it’s not here. OneChele asked to write a guest post over at her eCrib, so I obliged. Check it out. It’s about over-analyzing racism like Martin’s character did in Boomerang, except taking it a a tad bit too far.

Anyway, the five questions:

1. Did you give up anything for Lent? If so, what?

2. “Takeover” or “Ether”? Why?

3. What is your favorite restaurant ever?

4. If you had to give yourself a rap name or name a band, what would you choose?

5. “love is a circle….stay in it or around it…….just dont end up out of shape.” Does the aforementioned¬† quote make any sense to you?

Apology Scorecard

We all know Tiger Woods came out of seclusion for a few moments on Friday morning to apologize to the world (and prove that he’s capable of taking over television on days other than Sundays). Some of us watched it, and then some of us followed watching it by watching it again so we could better form opinions of what it meant, and whether or not he was sincere.

Then we (read: I) took to reading/viewing the opinions of others over the next few days, trying to see if everyone saw Tiger’s 15 minutes the way we saw them. Of course, they didn’t. A million people can see the same thing a million different ways.

For some reason (probably because I want to see him swing a golf club soon and pump his fist), I saw sincerity. Many others, full of skepticism, saw orchestration and a robotic-like performance from a well-oiled machine who was groomed to look nervous and stumble over his words.

Then I came across this. It’s the best piece I’ve read on Tiger’s 15-minute, Friday-morning peek-a-boo. It scanned the spectrum on the apology and got me thinking.

Short of hooking someone up to a lie-detector, how do you really judge an apology? Not just an apology broadcast to much of the free world (These are a dime a dozen at this point. see: Mayer, John), but even one that only your ears hear? How do you know whether or not to trust the words, “I’m sorry” when they’re uttered, by anyone?

“And then, like Olympic judges, we are left to rate his performance. On sincerity: 9.1. On emotion: 9.3. On artistic inerpretation: 9.0. His technical score: 8.7. Oh, the Spanish judge really scored him low on that one.” ~ Posnanski

That’s about what it feels like, judging a figure skating competition the first time you watch it. That’s how I feel whenever I’m receiving any apology. I’m always looking for sincere signs of sincerity (whatever that means). But I’m not sure what to believe. Hell, I’m often just in shock that someone is even apologizing to me because I find it rare that people own up to their screw-ups in the moment when they’re confronted about their wrongdoings.

Though I hate apologizing, I don’t have a problem with it. But I rarely show much emotion when I apologize, even if I do care a lot. I often just want out of that moment. No matter how minute or troubling it is, it always seems like someone is towering over you when they’re searching out an apology.

So I’m sure I don’t come across as sincere too often, though, I almost always mean it. But that easily could be Tiger, just uncomfortable knowing that the world has him and his words, even as he’s reading them, in a Petri dish. At least his wife understands that he can’t prove his words true in that light or any other.

Elin told Tiger that his “real apology will not come in the form of words,” as Tiger said on Friday early in his apology. That was the only part of that 15 minutes that matter to me. I suppose the hereafter is the only part of any apology that really matters, the only part of one you can accurately score.

FRQs: Tiger Woods, Y’all

Tiger’s talking today. Then going back to rehab. I had thoughts about the first sentence. Then the second one came along on Thursday night and kinda left me flustered. Everyone’s talking about things being orchestrated and I’m trying to understand why you’d make a statement in the middle of treatment. I thought he was coming back to play golf, like next week.

Kinda confusing, eh? I guess we’ll all find out what’s going this morning.

Anyway, the FRQs:

1. What’s the first thing you do when you get in the car?

2. How do you keep yourself from losing your mind when someone pisses you off?

3. Which cell phone provider, other than yours, do you think people say is the worst?

4. What NBA player would you pay to see play basketball first?

5. If you were Tiger, what would you say, if anything?

We Are What’s Wrong

I watched “We Are The World 25” one time and it was a waste of eight minutes of my life. I’ll never watch it again. It’s not that it’s bad. It’s just that it’s not “We Are The World” or anything close to it, which makes it horrific.

Lil Wayne and T-Pain blazing “We Are The World” with autotune laced tracks makes me believe that Michael Jackson would have burst into fits of spelling out L-O-V-E every minute he was in the studio with the people included in the remake.

And the actual rap addition including Kanye was laughable. Whoever thought it was a good idea should be banned from recording, writing and even thinking about music for the rest of his life. And if that’s Quincy Jones, it’s OK. He’s made enough great music to last a lifetime.

But again it makes me wonder, when do you actually try to raise the bar and do something better or better yet, something that hasn’t been done before? Instead of just striving for something, why not strive for greatness?

Idk. There are some people who don’t quite get it, those who believe that this is OK, if not on par with the actual recording. Everyone’s entitled to an opinion, but if you think this is acceptable, you’ve let your standards for good music go over the course of the last 25 years. They could have done better. They failed.

Anyway, here are three things in entertainment I’d love to see redone because I believe they could be enhanced.

Hav Plenty. I really wish this film would be re-made because there’s a powerful message that’s lost because of just how horrific the acting is in many moments. If it could actually be re-written in places and given an actual budget, I think it could fall in line with some of the other classic black romantic comedies.

Mario’s “Let Me Love You.” One of my favorite contemporary¬† R&B songs of the 00s. But Mario’s voice doesn’t quite do the song justice. My favorite remake of the 90s is Mary J. Blige’s take on “Sweet Thing.” I feel as though there’s some artist who has the voice to make this well-penned song (Ne-Yo wrote it) come to life again at some point this decade.

When Harry Met Sally. I know, it’s already a classic. But this film is sorta like the Superman of romantic comedies. The themes that are explored in the film are timeless. And I’d be curious to see what contemporary Harry and Sally would be like. Would they spend the majority of their time texting each other instead of watching the same old western together over the phone? Idk. But it would be interesting.

Anyway, what’s something you would like to see remade?

FRQs: V-Day

Yeah, Happy Singles Awareness Weekend.

This is how men feel on February 14th: Pressured.

The five questions:

1. What’s one thing that always has tended to annoy you in a relationship/marriage?

2. What’s your favorite Winter Olympic sport?

3.  What one city would you move to (not your current city or hometown) if you had to live there for the rest of your life?

4. What movie, every time it comes on television, do you always stop and watch, no matter what happens?

5. Worst Valentine’s Day story you’ve ever heard/experienced or the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve ever received. Go.