23. Rush Limbaugh

Read the text change in the cloud. What? It's just a parody. Besides, it could be anybody: Limbaugh, Sarah Palin (Blame-aholic President), Bobby "He's not my 'Jai-Ho'" Jindal or Michael Steele (aka Kermit the Frog). Chill out.

Read the text change in the cloud. What? It's just a parody. Besides, it could be anybody: Limbaugh, Sarah Palin (Blame-aholic President), Bobby "He's not my 'Jai-Ho'" Jindal or Michael Steele (aka Kermit the Frog). Chill out. Remember, I didn't take the original cartoon that seriously.

“By the end of the week he’ll be accusing me of being a secret communist because I shared my toys in kindergarten.” ~ then senator and current President Barack Obama on still Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., calling him a socialist/communist only days before the historic 2008 Presidential Election.

Dear Mr. Rush Limbaugh:

I wanted to wait until Saturday to send you this letter. I wanted to think it through more. But I can’t help it. I’m froggy. You went to work on President Barack Obama on Saturday, and I’m anxious to punch the clock on you and your rant.

Now, before I continue let me say this: I’m a moderate. I believe people who refuse to weigh each issue on its own merits and/or subscribe to an entire party belief system need to rethink their thought processes.

I planned on writing your people (Card-carrying GOP Members) and your polar opposites (Leftwing Nutjobs) later. Don’t worry, that punch and counter-punch are still forthcoming. But your little rant last Saturday got me punching keys.

That said, I must say this: you, sir, are nothing more than a batcrazy chimp with a $100 million microphone (note: the phrase “nothing more than” qualifies as proof that I’m not calling you a chimp. I’m technically saying you’re equal to or less than a chimp). You need to reconsider some of your values and words before you let them slip off your tongue. You disagree? Two words: Donovan McNabb.

Yes, you’ve long been in dire need of a permanent muzzle.

Saying that you want President Obama to fail is no different from Rev. Jeremiah Wright using the phrase “God Damned America” in or out of context. I could play the role reversal game and show you just how ignorant your rant to your friends was. But we’re in a recession, and I refuse to max out my Race Card limit on your foolishness.

Just know that saying you want our President to be unsuccessful is counterproductive to a healthy America. Also know that I understand that a healthy America is something you care little about. No, you refuse to see that the free-market policies and greed of the last decade have led us to this state. Remember, your friends W., Dick and the GOP were in control most of that time.

And you can’t humble yourself enough to give President Obama a chance to choose some new Oval Office drapes before you declare that you want him to fall flat on his face?

Don’t you understand that America is best as a country when the greatest number of people in our nation are thriving? Not when the wealthy have things on lock, the middle and working classes are forced to survive paycheck to paycheck and the poor continue spiraling in the wrong direction. We’ve lived this reality the last eight years.

We’ve learned that allowing wealthy Americans to hoard the spoils of our great nation is not what is best. Now even the wealthy are losing truckloads of money because of their own greed and Bernie Madoff.

The point: Selfishness is not a moral to which any political party — or person — should subscribe. We must share if we are to succeed. Is that socialism? No. Is there some semblance of socialism within that premise? Yes. But Utilitarianism is necessary to benefit all American people.

I know you won’t necessarily understand that. You’re selfish. You think you deserve every dime you get because people are deaf enough to give you their ears. But it’s OK. I don’t expect comprehension from you, your followers or friends. There’s a reason your party lost control of the United States. You all need to wake up soon or, as one of my good friends says, we’ll be revisiting the history of the Whig Party in reference to this once proud Republican establishment.

And that would be sad because I actually agree with some of what the party stands for in today’s society. I mean, I hate standing in lines at the DMV only to get to the front, learn that I must pay in cash and realize that I only have plastic. I know you do, too.

Praying for your sanity,



15 responses to “23. Rush Limbaugh

  1. Nicely written and to the point. Is it okay if I forward this to my peeps? more people need to know about you and your excellent writing.

  2. by all means … please forward it along.

  3. Good points and nice cartoon!

  4. Thanks for shooting me this. I’ve been reading you since your TSF comment and I gotta say I love your work. The premise of the site is as unique as their is and you know I gotta real nice chuckle reading the above post. You know I’m adding you right?

  5. Good looking Mizzo … the TSF will be on the roll within minutes.

  6. as your editor

    check your facebook.

    Well done. This is a good rant. I’ll put you in my status.

  7. This was very clever. Rush Limbaugh is a fat blowfish who doesn’t know how to STFU! I’m a moderate/independent as well (I know you know this) and I truly understand both political parties’ values but this piece of russian animal carcass lard will never learn to just be quiet and stop trying to make his listeners hate our current president before he can have enough time to prove himself. Didn’t they have harsh words for people that spoke badly about Bush calling them ‘un-patriotic’? Well look how nicely the tables have turned. He talks about Obama like he’s a socialist or a communist but the bottom line is that this so-called ‘socialist’ agenda that he’s on did not have to be if it wasn’t for the greedy fat cats on wall street. BOTTOM LINE! Rush honestly you can kiss me where the sun don’t shine and where I exit mine! This is the greatest country in the World and if you can’t have enough faith in our current leadership to succeed in this crisis then your loud idiotic voice will fall on deaf ears and continue to sink the GOP even further into oblivion. Sorry for the long post but you know my passion for this stuff…lol! Good post Damon 🙂

  8. ok…so i twittered and facebooked this and i will probably use this line….

    “We’re in a recession and I dont want to max out my Race Card on your foolishness….” I will probably subsitute Race Card for other types of cards as well…

    awesome writing, man!

  9. Nina, thanks so much …

    Anybody else wondering why Rush would be so full of himself to think he could actually debate Obama?

    Wise men don’t argue with chimps or fools …

  10. If people don’t use logic, ain’t no point in debating them.

    Rush is not bound by the rules of logic.

  11. Ok, Ok, Ok. I am here. No, this was great. Nicely done!

  12. Hi,
    Kimberlita forwarded this to me. As much as I have been for the GOP because I understood their desire to teach a man to fish rather than the continual fish sandwich handout, I have never been one to let one person speak for me just because I am…; In this case it is just shameful that Rush “chooses” sliding on the ungreased bannister of pseudo-self preservation. It’s looking like a bumpy ride. Thanks for speaking up. Dressie

  13. Dressie, great comment/analogy.

    I’ll take it a step further: I think you have to tease a man with Mahi Mahi so you can lead him into the water and teach him to fish for himself.

    Most of the poor in this nation have no clue as to what it means to do for themselves, and be successful at it. They need to see it and taste it so they can find the desire to chase their dreams as well.

    Where does that put my line of thinking? Somewhere in the middle.

  14. Let’s see I am undeniably Democrat. I can be called socialist or whatever else someone may see fit to call me. I can never be described as overly political though, I read it but I don’t lose sleep.

    The most ridiculous thing a person can ever say is “Yes Mr. President I want you to fail”

    Excuse me donkey face, but that man is a representation of you as an old racist white man and me as a young accepting black woman. And guess what, his failure is your failure and my failure. A failure for him plummets our country (young by many standards) into a dismal abyss. That’s not where I want to go. That’s not what I want my children to be born in. I personally don’t want anyone to fail. That’s just awful. Furthermore, we as a people and a country are taken back 245 years everytime you, sir, open your mouth. Yes that’s correct you take us right back to slavery. You are scum. No ifs or buts about it. When you finally figure out that a victory for Obama is a victory for you, it will probably be too late, but that’s okay..I don’t want you bringing your funk to my parade.

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