VI. Week of Upsets

Dame’s note: Cicely aka asyoureditor has been riding tough with me, editing most of the TMCY to keep me from (messing) up. And without her, trust that I would. She can write if she feels so led. So here’s Cicely’s first stab at a TMCY letter. Enjoy.

Dear May 17-23,

Yes, I’m talking to you. If I were a betting woman, I would have lost my house and my car so much money because of you. My father is a betting man, so thanks for the late payment on our Sprint bill.

You—last week—decided to say, “Hey, American public. I know you like these sure things, but, you know what, here’s a little salt in your sugar shaker.” I’m talking about killing King James’ winning streak, shorting the sexiest best dancer on “Dancing with the Stars” of first place and preventing the rise of America’s first gay Goth Idol.

So, what is it? You don’t like it when people have something to count on? You like seeing faces like this

True shock and awe on American Idol.

True shock and awe on American Idol.

My week of letdowns pretty much began Sunday with my adventure to the airport and three flight delays (thanks, Mother Nature, for all the rain 😦 ). Then came Tuesday’s “Dancing with the Stars” result show. No one expected the world’s most popular dumpee to win the show. But, seriously, the teenage gymnast? By “the narrowest margin in ‘Dancing with the Stars’ history,” notNastia Luken beat SATC’s naked neighbor. I was hurt, but could almost see that happening because of the “America’s-sweetheart” angle Shawn Johnson had going.

Then came Double Whammy Wednesday. I understand that LeBron and the boys have been on a crazy high lately. Maybe, in the spirit of competition, they needed to be knocked down a peg. But while watching the game on Wednesday, I saw the Cavs just beating up on the Magic in the first half. I decided the game wasn’t worth my time (plus, I was out with friends and there was wine to be consumed).

Also, because I was out Wednesday, I missed the American Idol finale.

Editor’s note: I’m not a huge AI fan. I’m a fan of all things pop culture. The first few episodes failed to grab my attention. But I’ve heard Kris and Adam sing and, therefore, can be a judge about who I want to be my American Idol (a la Ryan Seacrest).

I didn’t find out about the travesties of Wednesday night until Thursday morning. So, tell me, May 17-23, what is that you have against Adam Lambert? Is it the gelled hair? The black nails? The man’s love of all things “Wicked”?

To add insult to injury, you allow one of the most-anticipated weddings in CW history to go on. No, not tall broody guy and silly, over-emotional girl from “One Tree Hill.” Melanie and Derwin finally got hitched. And instead of allowing us a chance to savor their first year of marriage while taking on the big leagues, you pull the rug out from under us and say, “That’s all folks.”

The pain is over from watching my favorites fall to second (Gilles, I still want to give you a hug), or just fall off completely. But the sting of not being able to count on sure things is going to sizzle in my side for a while.

Week of May 17-23, you sucked—like a Eureka vacuum and a $5 crack whore on her favorite pipe.

With a grudge in my heart,

Cicely :p


15 responses to “VI. Week of Upsets

  1. Great start! As I said in the last letter, I don’t watch The Game so I can’t comment on that and I don’t care about basketball or anyone playing so I can’t comment on that either.

    I WAS, however, upset by the American Idol finale. I mean, WTH?! I knew in my spirit that America wasn’t ready for a gay American Idol but I hoped that the contestants would be judged on their singing abilities alone. I will admit that Kris put it down with his version of Kanye’s “Heartless” but overall Adam blew him out of the water. *sigh* oh well…..

    • @Tam: I know. The week kept getting worse with the Cavs (although you don’t watch sports). But Kris was ever so humble with his win and his shocked face says it all.

  2. HAAA! This was hilarious. Although I know NOTHING for American Idol (but I heard about the surprise) and the NBA, I enjoyed reading this.

    “Week of May 17-23, you sucked—like a Eureka vacuum and a $5 crack whore on her favorite pipe.”

    Pure hilariousness!

  3. Great letter, Cicely. It was a week of upsets. It’s a good thing that like you, I’m not a betting woman. It’s weird though…for some reason when I initially watched The Game’s finale, I didn’t think Derwin & Melanie actually got married in the hospital chapel, I thought it was a daydream they were both having especially since there were no witnesses. But I watched it again and now think they did get married…alas, we’ll never know for sure & will have to draw our own ending…CRAZINESS! As for the NBA Playoffs…they’re all over the place. I can’t call them but I know the result I’d like to see. Oh, well…

    • @Shawnta’: The result I was dreaming of looks like it will remain a dream *sigh* 😦

    • @shawnta@aye: I still haven’t watched the last five episodes or so because it’s a Friday.

      But IDK about Melanie and Derwin actually getting married. It just doesn’t seem plausible after three seasons of turmoil.

      It seems so rushed, like the abrupt ending of the show. Maybe that’s why they did it? Oh well, I guess we’ll never know. …

      • @damon: Right. I’ve chosen to believe that they did get married (only because they cancelled the show), but when I originally saw the finale episode, I really did think it was a daydream. After you watch you’ll have to share your thoughts.

        • @shawnta: I still have to watch five episodes or so before I get to that one. smh.

          • @damon: You sound like me with my Ugly Betty recordings or my United States of Tara and In Treatment series (well, when I was still faithfully watching them). 🙂 You’ll catch up one of these days. Perfect for a day when you don’t want to do anything or be “bothered” with anyone.

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